I'm finally in the process of binding this book. It took me long enough to get it printed. I finished it at the wrong timing of holidays, and then due to another covid wave, the print shop was not open. And then it almost happened that they ran out of toner when I went, and they had been waiting for the toner to ship for a month and a half or something... but he got it printed on the black toner of the colour printer....  I'm just binding all the books now. T_T

I bought corel painter 2021 from humble bundle, so I was messing with it the last few days. I don't really know what is it with me and digital painting. Part of it may just be that analogue is always easier, all brushes will more or less function the same way. But not digital brushes. and I don't have patience.

This actually brings me to the more core problems of my relationship with art. I think I want to do everything, but of course I can't do everything. That also leads to a sort of confused identity, because there isn't one thing that I'm focused on. When the whole world of online art and social media tells artists that "you have to find your niche," create your "branding," going all over the place is definitely not what makes people recognize your work.

I have tried to delete and make new social media accounts, maybe part of it feel that none of what I have in the past represents who I am currently, which also changes at random for me as I cannot focus on one thing.

There is so far no conclusion.

I got an oblique pen holder for calligraphy. I'm not feeling significant difference yet, other than I don't have to rotate my paper at an angle. 

I don't really have anything interesting to say right now. I pulled out a calligraphy nib to try and do more flourish type calligraphy. Except that I couldn't find the pen holder that fits (I am still living in boxes of stuff after moving in May, because of the lack of space), mostly feeling too lazy to sort through everything just for a pen holder, and I thought this old Hello Kitty stick eraser would work, and it does. DIY pen holder alternative!

Such shaky calligraphy.

I used to tweet a lot a few years ago, until social media got very depressing in a way like, I don't even want to say anything at all, just tweet the art and call it a day. It also gets somewhat mendoukusai to have to reply to people sometimes when I don't have anything particular to reply. So maybe I should just blog instead?

Paraphrasing Teoh, he mentioned in his yt video that there are much more merits in blogging than posting on social media (especially instagram) for artists. I can't help but agree. I'm getting social media fatigue? I'm also not really sure what I am trying to gain from there? Though I am still on twitter a lot. Albeit lurking.